Two days before I was leaving Thailand I wanted to go eat at my favorite restaurant for the last time. I got there 5 minutes before they were closing and my favorite area to sit on, a deck/patio area, was almost closed. They had taken the cushions off trying to close it down but one beautiful man sat there drawing. I went and sat at a table right next to him anyway and they let me order food. I sent my friend a picture of my "food" and the gorgeous tall mysterious man sitting next to me. I knew if I didn't say something to him, I would regret it, So I went for it, I asked him about his drawing and he turned to me with a big smile and open heart. I could feel it, sense it and hear how genuinely authentic he was. We continued to talk while I finished my food. I went up to pay and he waited by the front door for me. It was 9 pm in a foreign country at my favorite restaurant that I took a chance and went wondering around the city with a stranger.
One of the first conversations we had was about love. A deep conversation that not everyone wuld be ready for especially for fear of hidden agendas. However we open-heartedly discussed what love truly is. How society and people have changed it to attachments and expectations. How much love we have for all beings and ourselves. The healing power of love and so much more. At this point I already had love for this man I had just met. Love for his honesty, the raw nature in which he expressed his truth. How much he had already taught me and will continue too. He was strong in his feminine energy, going with the flow and creating, following his heart. We decided to go with the flow together and just wander around. First thing that caught us was a didgeridoo band playing in the street. We sat there listening, smiling, enjoying each others company. We talked about traveling and family. How close we are with our mothers and how hard it is to leave family to travel. Every word that came out of his beautiful mouth had me in awe. People like this exist. Men like this exist!!
We continued going with the flow, wandering around, with a hopeful destination of the night bazaar. I knew where it was so I began taking the lead and making decisions where to turn and he says "I will follow you". The principle behind this for a man to feel comfortable enough to allow the woman to lead, to enjoy the journey with her is expressive in itself. We made it to the night bazaar, he tried on funny girly hats and we giggled together. I showed him some of the cool stuff I noticed when I was there last. We played and oogled like children just loving every moment.
He travels out of a backpack so he doesn't buy much. However he likes stickers and patches, So we found a table full of patches and began sorting through them. Finding ones for him, I chose a cute hippie lettered one that said love. He wanted to buy me one too so he got me a matching patch that said love. My little heart was melting and I was smiling from ear to ear. We began leaving, stopping by live bands so I could dance around a little bit. We both got stuck at a crystal store wanting to buy all the beauties in there. Literally everything about him, his path, his outlook and light matched mine.
Then we got on the conversation of sex and conscious sex specifically. As we discussed how meaningful and spiritual it is, but how many people do not see it this way. The energetics of combining our energies in unity. The sacredness of the womb space. Then he says " Yea I am done with that ego sex" and my jaw dropped. This was a comment I will never forget an I will continue to follow in my life. I was so happy to hear a man say this. I was currently on the path of no sex because I was living through my ego and desires and wanted to stop doing that. I met a complete stranger who mirrored my own thoughts and beliefs. If I didn't already love him before I definitely did now.
We asked each other about our life goals and hearts desires. I told him my dream of hosting healing retreats and eventually having my own land. Having a sacred space where a group of us lived off the land, allowing others to stay while they work on themselves and find healing within themselves. He looked at me with bliss in his eyes explaining that was his goal too! And that he just spent three weeks in the jungle, learning how to live sustainably off the land. Then he asked if we could do it together!?!? Of course I shreaked yes! When you find someone who is part of your tribe , someone placed in your path for a reason, you just know.
Next conversation was about family and raising kids in this world today. How much community and freedom they need along with truth and love. We agreed on everything. I could not believe that someone I had only met hours before could make me feel so much love and excitement along with trust. He was pure, honest and nothing but himself. He was not feeding me what I wanted to hear to have sex with me. He was nothing but his authentic self with no worries or expectations.
It was getting very late and he walked me to my hotel room. I wasn't ready to say goodbye. This was too magical and I didn't know if I would see him again. We hugged like four times and he gave me his facebook name to find him. I invited him in because I was scared I wouldn't see him again and he assured me that our paths would cross again. I had to be up early for an appointment so we decided not to have him come up. We said our goodbyes and I went to my room. I was so high off of our energy together, floating in the clouds. There was no way I could fall asleep. I found him on facebook and we began messaging. We continued to message for weeks afterwards too. Just learning, expressing and giving gratitude for our time together. It was beautiful, authentic and raw, if I have not said those words enough.
The point of sharing this is that there is so much more out there than what is currently around us. We meet people to learn and grow. Talking with strangers has helped me, and them countless times. Obviously I feel it out and am safe about it. But one night with another soul taught me that real love is available. Love is not about playing games and trying to be some idea of what the other person wants. Love is being your true self and expressing it without regret. Showing your truth, your flaws and your uniqueness with an open heart. Then when someone can do the same, real love comes into play. Take chances, risk your ego and open up your heart. Connections can be made on another level when we simply allow things to flow, not over-thinking them or letting fear get in the way. Let love into your life and let go of fear.